Time to Break Up? SWANS-Specific Advice For When To Sail Away Alone
Getting married is not about a diamond ring or the beautiful white dress. It’s not about what your parents or friends or colleagues think about you. It’s not about checking a box on the list of life experiences. It’s about sharing a life with someone—and it’s hard work even under the best of circumstances. Settling for a “he’ll do” kind of guy isn’t something that should be on the table for intelligent SWANS (Are you among the SWANS? Take this quiz to find out). That’s not to say that a happy marriage shouldn’t be a goal. But it’s a different kind of effort from, say, your graduate school application or landing that corner-office job.
If you’re among the SWANS, you’re a smart woman — so be honest: Does anything on this list strike a chord? If so, it may be time to move on… alone.
• You are constantly competing with each other for who is better, who is more successful.
• You and/or he avoids all discussions of “the future”, “marriage” or “us”
• You are embarrassed to introduce him to your friends
• He hasn’t introduced you to his friends
• It’s been a while, and he—or you—still haven’t told the parents that you’re dating
• You fight regularly about money, and who earns more.
• You are happier at the office than you are with him
• When you succeed, he rains on your parade.
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